To be honest, I’m not quite sure what to call this post.
I had a magical day where every link I clicked seemed to bring a fresh Jesus-style magic. There’s two songs, some classical art and a video that I’ve been trying to find an excuse to post for a few weeks now. So please forgive the slapdash nature of the post and understand that in my mind, these things all go together in a really obvious way.
So let’s call this an exercise in tangential relationships which might be a nice way of saying it’s a cop out post.
This afternoon I made the mistake of watching the following video. I’m not going to act like I know a damn thing about rap but I’m pretty sure that this is not good.
DJ Pillow Queen- My Pussy Feels like Jesus
But it’s possible that it’s not good in the same way that Willy D is not good, which is to say, brain meltingly awesome.
The biggest problem I had with My Pussy Feels Like Jesus is that not 5 minutes earlier I had been enjoying some Ugly Renaissance Babies which meant that any time DJ Pillow Queen said Jesus, I pictured something like this-
Which, I’m sure you’ll agree is both terrifying and absolutely not what you want to associate with a vagina.
But then, Youtube made my life.
You see, something caught my eye in the related videos list, something that I am forever grateful that I clicked, something that is now probably my favorite song.
Birdcloud- Saving Myself for Jesus
You can titty-fuck me, Tie me up, dry-hump me
and slap me in the face, I’ll even let you call me mommy
He died upon the cross, let me get my point across
My hymen belongs to Jesus
It is so delightful! And serves as the perfect soundtrack to Ask A Jackass: Purity.
Which in turn leads me to Purity Bear.
You see, I’ve been waiting for the right time to show him to you guys but I knew that this decision could affect the rest of my life, but this? This feels right.
This, to me, is everything that is wrong with the purity movement. And the fact that I was able to build a logical bridge from a song about the divinity of someone’s pussy to this is everything that is wrong with me.
